I write a lot about this personal attribute as I, along with humanistic psychologist, Abraham Maslow (1908-1970), believe it to be the highest attribute and achievement possible in the human experience.

Signature qualities of a self-actualized person include: realizing one’s full potential; self-fulfillment; self-expression; a striving for personal growth and peak experiences; the search for knowledge and meaning; a basic acceptance of nature, or “the way things are;” and a strong sense of morals, ethics, insight, and self-transcendence.

In Karma, I speak of the highest spiritual goals being Self-actualization and re-union with God.  That is, the full knowledge and expression of our spiritual individuality–a reclamation of our original, “immaculate concept” in the mind of our Creator–along with the will to free ourselves from karmic ties and earthly attachments in order to be free to make our spiritual ascension.

I am currently editing my next work, Ten Difficult Women: Their Impact and Legacy (copyright 2012). When relating these ten remarkable subject women–from different times, places, cultures, ethnicity’s, and socio-economic backgrounds–one thing they all share is their self-actualization: as women and as human beings.

As a consequence, each has transcended her personal interests and concerns, felt-needs, and desire for ease and pleasure to make important, lasting contributions to her own society and future generations.

Maslow believed that, in order to attain this highest, most fulfilling state of being, we must first find ways to fulfill the four lower needs in his hierarchy: biological and physiological, safety, emotion-based needs of belonging and love, and self-esteem.

If you haven’t given much thought to why you sometimes feel “something is missing;” or, that you aren’t giving enough or Being and becoming all you are capable of Being and becoming, you might find his construct and theories both interesting and enlightening.

You can obtain a listing of his various books, articles, and audio/visual downloads at: http://www.maslow.com/index.html.

No matter how upbeat and optimistic we strive to be, everyone has bad days, sad days, and days we wish could be “do-overs.”

So, how can we refocus, re-energize, and keep going during such times?  Here are a few things that work for me:

* Connect or reconnect with a trustworthy friend whom you can be open and honest with–and who has good listening skills.

* Get out of the house or office and into nature.  Even a short walk along the shore, in the woods, down a quiet country lane, or in a local park can sometimes be enough to activate the “reset” button.

*Drop what you are doing (or brooding about) and focus on your pet for an hour:  Play with your cat.  Cuddle your rabbit.  Take your dog to the park for a game of fetch or a nice, long walk. Groom or ride your horse.  Really watch and appreciate the beauty of your pet birds or aquarium fish.

* Journal.  In other words, talk to yourself about what ails you.  Writing down problems and disappointments externalizes them and can be the first step toward understanding and resolution.

* Meditate, pray, do yoga, or whatever you do to spiritually center yourself and transcend the mind chatter that is throwing you off-balance.

* Listen to good music, wander through an art gallery, visit an arboretum.  Immerse yourself in beauty.

*Borrow a kid for the day.  Play, have fun, and soak-up some of his or her youthful exuberance.

* Begin and end each day with an inspirational thought, prayer, or meditation.  There are many “daily meditation/thought for the day” publications in print.  Two such magazines are: The Upper Room (non-denominational Christian) and My Daily Visitor (Catholic Christian).

If you’d rather surf the Internet, there are many inspirational websites and blogs out there.  The first e-mail I open each morning is a “Thought for the Day” from The Association for Research and Enlightenment.  Each begins with the phrase: “Make the World a Better Place Because Ye Have Lived In It” and is followed with a short reading by Edgar Cayce.  Here is one from a couple of days ago:

“Hold no grudges.  Find no fault with others.  DO show appreciation for all efforts, not only for self but appreciation for the OPPORTUNITY to speak to and with others as to how they should appreciate THEIR opportunities among their associates in WHATEVER walk of life it may be.”  Reading 2514-3

Have a good day!

One of the most serious impediments to spiritual centeredness and growth is attachment–to things, memories, ideas, habits, places, outcomes–even to relationships and beliefs.  This is not to say that you shouldn’t have or value any of these; but, to be “attached” is a totally different thing.  Attachment means to be tied or fastened to;  its antonym is, “to be free.”

Perhaps the three most detrimental attachments on my list are: things, memories, and habits.  Just think about how much time and effort materialists put into earning the money, or ingratiating themselves to others, in order to acquire all the things they think they need to surround themselves with in order to feel successful, secure, and good about themselves.  Then, how much more time and effort is wasted on keeping all that stuff clean, shiny, showcased, and in good running order. (And, of course, authentic, lasting feelings of security and self-worth can only be generated from within, anyway.)  Can you imagine the good that could be achieved if such a person exerted the same amount of energy, and spent even a fraction of the money it takes to acquire and maintain a lot of useless stuff, to selfless, philanthropic endeavors?

Attachment to memories of times long ago, people long gone, and events that occurred decades ago is another waste of time.  I have known people whose “reality” consisted of yellowed photographs, dog-eared letters, and sentimental reveries of a past that probably exists only in their imagination, instead of living, learning, growing, and contributing to the Present. It is easy to become stuck in the past when so much attention is focused upon it; and, as a result, to fritter away the most precious commodity available to us–TIME. The mantra:” BE Here Now ” could be a useful antidote to such wistfulness.

Habits, I’ve read, can even outlive one’s physical life and keep a departed soul earthbound in order to continue on with them.  Spiritual teachings frequently talk about “entities” which hover around people who indulge in their previous, earthly addictions–like smoking, drinking, gluttony, and specific sexual activities.  Their attachment to certain habits and sensations enjoyed when in embodiment continues to be so strong that these overshadow everything else–even the desire to ascend to higher, purer spiritual realms.  I guess this is why liquor stores advertise “Wine and Spirits” for sale!

Attachment to relationships which are no longer harmonious, uplifting, or compatible with one’s current  sensibilities, life goals, and values can go beyond deadening to become depressing and destructive.  This is especially true in certain adult child to parents, parents to adult child,  and dysfunctional marriage situations.  Clinging to such inappropriate relationships can almost always be traced to psychological dependencies, fear, laziness, or strict conformity to social expectations and an overwhelming desire to “look good” to others.

A tie to geography is yet another stultifying and, it seems to me, unnatural attachment.  We are born and raised where we are born and raised because our parents chose to live in that place.  Once we evolve into mature individuals, our unique interests, climate and cultural preferences, career, and independently formed friendships should naturally steer us to the most appropriate location for us to thrive in.

Finally, long-ago formed ideas, beliefs, and the desire for particular outcomes should be re-evaluated, discarded, updated, or replaced at regular intervals and when it feels natural for us to do so.  As my favorite essayist, Ralph Waldo Emerson, states:  “Consistency is the hobgoblin of little minds.”  It is also unnatural to our growth and evolution.

Don’t be afraid to grow, move, learn, change, evolve. When you do, you become as a clear, lively, babbling brook.  When you don’t, you risk becoming like one of those still, stagnant, smelly puddles off to the side.

During each 4th of July, my thoughts turn to our nation’s and the world’s warriors.  What are their personal qualities?  Why do they choose such a vocation? Can one with a warring mentality be a spiritual, high-minded person, as well?

Since I tend to view the latter as being peaceful, centered, and internally motivated, to believe that one can be both would seem a contradiction in terms. However, while writing Karma, I gained new and different insights.  One section of the book features interviews with and profiles of people who believe in reincarnation and karma, and one of those written about is General George S. Patton, the distinguished U.S. Army General from WW II.

I only included him because I wanted to provide a broad sampling of people from diverse backgrounds and occupations and remembered him as one who openly discussed these beliefs.  While researching his background, I learned that he came into the world with past-life memories intact, innate talents and skills, a self-perceived knowledge of his soul’s purpose, and an extraordinary drive to fulfill it.  He “knew” he was meant to become a great soldier as clearly as he “knew” he had fought on numerous battlefields throughout a series of past lives.

Patton was also a poet; and, in his lengthy poem, “Through a Glass Darkly,” he writes:

So as through a glass, and darkly

The age long strife I see

Where I fought in many guises,

Many names, but always me.

So forever in the future

Shall I battle as of yore,

Dying to be born a fighter,

But to die again, once more.

Patton clearly believed his destiny was to continually be born and die a warrior.  And, his prolific writings seem to indicate that he understood “destiny” to be the result of uniting one’s personal will with the will of God.

I had a hard time entertaining Patton’s view that it could be God’s will that anyone should actualize and perfect him/ herself a “perpetual warrior.”  This reluctance emanated from my personal bias against viewing war as a noble endeavor or acknowledging military types as the highest expression of humanity the world has to offer. Yet, I also felt moved to delve more deeply into this bias. When I did so, I bagan to recall the many portrayals of warriors in religious literature, myth, legend, and history.

For instance, Archangels are Principal angels.  One of the nine orders of celestial attendants of God, they are pure spirit and have never descended into human form.  Archangel Michael has forever been depicted as an armored, sword-wielding warrior, and there are many biblical references to God’s “army,” “legions,” and “hosts” of angels.

Several revered saints were soldiers, including St. Louis, the Crusader King of France; St. George, the dragon-slaying Christian Knight who is the patron Saint of England; and the visionary soldier and martyr, St. Joan of Arc.

Many godly men of the Old Testament were men-of-arms, including King David, Samson, and Joshua.  There existed religious-military orders, such as Knights Templar’s and the institution of medieval knighthood–the Age of Chivalry–which refers to combatants of courage, valiance, generosity, courtesy, and gallant behavior on behalf of society’s weakest members–especially women.

Many of the friends and acquaintances I interviewed discussed their views about war and soldiering in thought-provoking ways, as well.  Most noted a distinction between types of and causes for wars, noting that, though generally pacifistic, they would enlist for battle in wars being waged for causes they believed in–such as those which prompted American involvement in WW II.  Others noted that if it became necessary to defend themselves, their family, their country, or their freedoms they would willingly enlist.

Still others stated they would enlist only if every possible effort had been exerted to resolve differences and injustices and had failed.  One noted that Jesus said, the greatest expression of love is one who gives up his life for his friends; and that those who truly believe in a cause, and perish in defense of their comrades or innocent civilians, might be expressing  ” a very high form of love.”  Another feels that, if one does engage in battle for what they believe to be a just cause, he or she should look to the Bhagavad-Gita for guidance and strive to perform their duty with the “detachment” this holy book describes.

Much to think about.  And, when combined with the selfless, heroic stories and motivations of the many wounded troops interviewed on television yesterday, I think it is time to let go of my long-held bias and admit that warriors can, indeed, be spiritual, high-minded, and engage in battle.